Gen Z and the secret backward step: Why young men suddenly expect obedience from women again

You know the feeling, right? You're sitting comfortably at a wine tavern, the schnitzel's been eaten, the Grüner Veltliner is going down nicely – and then the conversation turns to young people. Back in the day, we used to get worked up about long hair or loud music. Now, it's more complicated. A whole lot more complicated. Because just when we thought each new generation would automatically be more liberal, more tolerant, more equal, it turns out: The Generation Z is shockingly conservative on some points. Especially when it comes to the roles of men and women.

The shock for Boomer parents

A recent, much-discussed study from the UK has confirmed it in black and white: Nearly a third of young men aged 16 to 29 think a wife should obey her husband. Not in conservative religious sects, not in some developing country – but right next door, in a country we often culturally perceive as progressive. I nearly choked on my coffee when I saw that figure. My parents, Boomers through and through, were horrified. They fought for self-determination back in the 70s, and now their grandchildren are rolling their eyes when equality is mentioned? It really makes you wonder: Have we been looking in the wrong direction all this time?

Mama's boys and the prince effect

Of course, you immediately ask yourself: How did it come to this? The answer might be closer than we think. I came across a comment by a British columnist recently that hit the nail on the head, and I just can't shake it. She says we mothers (and fathers) should finally stop treating our sons like little princes. No joke. If we teach boys from a young age that the world belongs to them, that they'll be waited on, that they're the strong heroes and girls are the pretty princesses, then we shouldn't be surprised at the result later on. This Gen Z didn't just fall out of the sky. They're our children. And a part of them – admittedly, a frighteningly large part – seems to have understood the message exactly as intended: The man is in charge.

Protests here, backlash there – the contradictions of a generation

Here's the confusing part: This same generation that holds such old-fashioned views is also the one taking to the streets for climate action on Fridays. The Gen Z protests against the far-right, against racism, for queer rights – they haven't died out. Quite the opposite. But maybe that's precisely the point. We mustn't make the mistake of tarring the whole generation with the same brush. There isn't just one Gen Z. There are young feminists loudly fighting for change – and there are young men who, in an uncertain world, long for clear structures. And this longing for order can then manifest itself in such crude ideas. The economic situation, the housing crisis, climate change – all of this breeds insecurity. And in times of insecurity, some unfortunately fall back on what seems tried and tested: the strong man, the obedient woman.

• The conservative core: Around a third of young men want a return to traditional gender roles.
• The progressive vanguard: At the same time, Gen Z is the most diverse and loudest generation when it comes to climate and social protests.
• The silent majority: The majority are probably just confused, trying to find their own path between TikTok trends and an uncertain future.

The 'Gen Z stare' and the new bible

Do you know that look? That Gen Z stare that twenty-somethings sometimes give you? As if you're a walking fossil who understands nothing about the world. I used to put it down to youthful arrogance. Now I wonder: Maybe they're partly right. Maybe we really don't understand how their minds work. They have their own Gen Z Bible – except it's not bound in leather, but made up of a thousand TikTok videos, Instagram Reels, and Discord chats. Their rules, their morality, their understanding of respect – all of this is being completely redefined right now. We shouldn't ignore the fact that ancient patterns sometimes resurface in the process. But we shouldn't simply demonise it either. We need to understand it.

What does this mean for Britain?

Here in Britain, where the traditional family image is often still deeply ingrained, this development could be particularly interesting. Will Generation Z succeed in this backward step? Or will the loud protests of the other half ultimately set the tone? I'm intrigued to find out. And I'm looking forward to the next pub conversation. Because one thing's for sure: life won't be boring with this generation. It's as contradictory and multi-layered as our times. And we should pay close attention – even if that Gen Z stare sometimes stings a bit.